MAMA SADIO IS ETERNAL
Life has shown me the power of presence, death and grief so vividly in the past month. I am going to try to use words to convey a feeling still being clarified.
I created a mixtape with some friends called ETERNAL which was released in February of this year. It closes with the project’s title song on which my Mother asks the listener, “Do you want to live forever?” to which they say, “Yeah” she instructs, “Show the world who you are.” My Mother transitioned June 12th, 2026 and will live on forever because the world saw her and even when it did not, she saw herself.
There is a profound gift in seeing my Mother through the eyes of others she’s touched. Her influence is so powerful that I now see her legacy as THE Mother not just MY Mother. The way that she will be remembered as a nurturer, a teacher and a warrior for her people is the essence of Motherhood more than the embodied performance of it. Her success in this life has been solidified through her death. I could not have guessed this truth because in my viewing her humanity over time, I remember so many versions of her. I have know her for thirty years and she truly allowed me to see her in adulthood. In her fullness, she’s every woman.
Growing up, when people would ask me what my parents do for a living, I’d say my Dad was a comedian and my Mother was a spiritualist. They both have had several jobs throughout my life but those titles have been most consistent. I witnessed my Mother dive head first into many spiritual traditions of African influence through a uniquely African American effort to connect to the Motherland. She would gather what resonated and move on with reverence and grace for the lessons learned and friendships gained. I’ve never known anyone else to dance through disciplines the way she did. Ultimately she discovered that what was consistent in all of these spiritual practices is that nature is a central influence in their ritual and healing practices, that’s what she clung to.
Hoodoo uses nature to influence the body, mind and heart. Christianity uses nature to decide holy days and holy gifts. Ifa uses nature to beckon and gift deities. So forth and so on. I’m sure you can think of more examples.
Her effort was to focus on what unifies Black Folks in our thread to spirits and ancestors. What would influence her to move away from various communities was dogma, sexism, petty conflict, ego and lack of integrity. The humanity in it would often distort the Spirit and intention.
Mama Sadio was a passionate and committed woman. She would say her work was to “gather the women” so when she noticed the traits that divide us she sought to distill what unifies us. Through much trial and error, she designed a system of thought that welcomes women of any faith walk. She would assist them in letting their guard down and focusing on the strength in our togetherness and in trusting their own gifts.
When she died, it rained in Memphis for nine days and on the tenth day we gathered at Black Seeds Urban Farm to celebrate her life, there was not a cloud in the sky. Nature affirmed our right to grieve and our right to celebrate. I cry as I write this because these seemingly polar activations are both happening so intensely right now within myself and my family. I’m so proud of my Mommy, her heart and her influence. I’m so thankful that she is so loved and I witness that now more than ever. I’m overwhelmed by the reflections that affirm her. I’m heartbroken that I can’t call her and tell her about how I’m feeling right now. I won’t ever have another meal made by her hands nor can I call her to remind me what herbs to use for whatever ailment. She was so much to me: mother, friend, community member, teacher, herbalist, confidante. I am in mourning.
And yet, I have the sound of her voice affirming her forever on a mixtape called ETERNAL. I did not do that with this in mind but nature is so kind to me as her seed for affirming its divinity that I am gifted with outward evidence that I’ve BEEN preparing for this moment. I had dreams that prepared me and we had conversations that faced death’s inevitability back when I was a child. I was ready to play my role for my Mama before we even left the hospital where her former vessel laid cold. She prepared me.
I was snatched into presence on the day of her passing soon after deciding with my spiritual sisters that our primary focus is being deeply in the moment. With their assistance, we were able to honor Mama Sadio so beautifully through three events that were for her mind, body and spirit. Each one was such an acute execution with our knowing of her guiding the way. As the oldest daughter, I couldn’t afford denial, anger, bargaining or depression. I was thrusted into acceptance and activation. Now, as the dust has settled and her remains are in a box, I have to decide how to be in this world without her. I’m so conflicted about re-entering the hamster wheel of bill cycles and conversations with uninteresting people when I really just want to concentrate on Mommy and write her songs, cook big meals and immortalize her legacy. I’m available to a new rhythm and as I learn what that feels like, I ask for your kind thoughts and that you listen to ETERNAL on repeat so her voice can live on through us.
With a heart heavy, full of gratitude and longing, I say Ibaye MAMA SADIO. I will never stop speaking your name, my Queen.